Oh the many milestones you have passed this year, Buba and now you are not a baby no more and the toddler days are fading away fast now too. I don’t know where the time goes but somehow this weekend while I was looking at you standing next to your Daddy you seemed so grow up, and so mature. It’s like I got a mini glimpse as you stood there into your young childhood days where you weren’t tantruming like a toddler, you weren’t whining like a toddler, you weren’t wanting to be held or sit in the stroller like a toddler. You wanted to be free. You wanted to explore. You wanted to walk and talk like a big kid. For a day you gave us all that glimpse into childhood instead of toddlerhood. It has faded for now and your toddler like ways have returned but I know these days will come more frequently soon enough. You will be in school soon and I will be begging to see a glimpse of your toddler days again, if only for a moment.
Missy Moo, I am not sure I was ready for you to become quite so independent so quickly. You know your mind and you know what you want and Mommy lately isn’t one of them. It has sadden me that you don’t want me to cuddle you as much anymore you want to go off and play. You don’t come to me to comfort you as much you pick yourself up and brush yourself off. You are on the go 24/7 just like your Momma but you don’t stop as much for closeness like you used to. I should have been prepared but you are my last baby and I wish that your need for me, would have lasted a bit longer. That it wouldn’t have left me so suddenly and leave me feeling like you don’t need or want Mommy anymore. I know you know I love you and am here for you no matter what but while you pass milestones after milestones and become a toddler I will grieve over my baby no more.
While you both become a child and a toddler instead of a baby and toddler it has left me feeling unneeded but in its place a feeling of being blessed has taken over. Blessed that you both have each other. Blessed that you may not run to me as much as you used to but you run to each other – still. You hold hands as you explore the world one day at a time, together. I couldn’t feel more love and happiness when I am around the two of you; watching you hug, kiss, play, laugh, learn, and love together. It’s a beautiful thing to witness and the strongest bond I could have ever ask for between the two of you!