When I first began to be a mum, I thought I should do everything. Be everywhere at once. Say yes to everything. Have the perfect home, perfect child, and matching socks. Spoiler: I did none of that for long. Eventually, I let go of what simply wasn’t worth worrying about. And life’s been a little simpler since. The following are five things that I’ve stopped worrying about and why you should too.
1. Matching Socks with Instagram-Worthy Clothing
There used to be a day when I’d sort through a mountain of laundry only to find a coordinating set for a nursery. That, in my head, constituted having my act together. Nowadays, as long as they’re clean enough and about the same size, we go with it. Suppose my toddler’s walking around with a piece of Paw Patrol on one foot and a stripey spaceship on the other, no worries. No one’s handing out medals for matching cotton.
2. Feeding Them “Perfectly” Every Meal
I would spiral if dinner wasn’t perfect, rainbow-coloured, home-prepped, and well-balanced. Now? A ham sandwich and a few carrot sticks are enough if a whole day’s gone pear-shaped. Some days’ lunches are packed with vegetables. Some are not. And you know what? They’re still developing. They’re still thriving. And they’re not going to remember that time they had toast and apple slices for a meal as opposed to some gourmet masterpiece.
3. A Pinterest Perfect House
Don’t misunderstand me, I like a tidy room. But I’ve resigned myself to not thinking the living room should be showroom-ready at all times. Some mornings, cushions are on the floor, the Lego’s a minefield, and clothes are staring at me from the basket like a total challenge. I used to panic about it. Now I just lift a pile and make a clearing for us to sit down with a cuppa. That’s the point.
Humor aside: we’ve gone to get new garage doors fitted. Edinburgh is full of individuals who can do that, as it happens. We were distracted from doing that in favour of clearing out the garage. Figure that one out.
4. Comparing Myself to Other Mums
That’s a tricky one. I would scan social media and feel instantly behind. That mum’s timetable was colour-coded. Another one made Bento boxes with smiley-face fruit. And I’d only recently managed cereal in a bowl. But comparing’s a trap. Just because it’s what another family did doesn’t mean it’s your benchmark of gold. Bask in your own routine’s triumphs, no matter that they appear insignificant on the outside.
5. Being On Time for Everything
We strive. We are sometimes five minutes behind. Sometimes we forget the water bottle or circle back for a comfort blanket. I no longer believe that Armageddon is imminent when the morning doesn’t go as planned. Most are more tolerant of us than we often assume they are.
I’ve found we’re far less flustered when I give myself that breathing room, and the kids definitely pick up on that too.
If you’re in that season of life where everything feels overwhelming, I see you. I really do. It’s okay to loosen the grip on the bits that don’t matter as much as we once thought. Sometimes, letting go is the kindest thing you can do for you and for them.
